Soooooo!! you want to see the Wizzzzarrrddd...

okay, wanna know what happened?

This year, I went to nationals with the least amount of anxiety or trepidation that I’d ever had. Obviously, not being part of a team & just having to depend on your own smarts took a load off, as opposed to having to strategize with 4 other people & make decisions based on what’s best for the team. Yay for selfish me!

The organization for slam bouts is kinda confusing, so I’ll try to keep it simple: A single bout will have 5 teams of four poets each and 1 individual poet, called a “storm poet”. The object of each TEAM is to have the most points at the end of the bout after performing and being scored for a poem each round. So the teams are there to beat each other. The storm poets job is to beat EVERYBODY IN THE ROOM by getting the highest individual score of the entire bout. I was a storm poet.

First off, the city of St Louis is a very nice place, although I was pretty much confined to the downtown business area which like most major cities, kinda loses life after folks get off work & go home. Where can a brotha go to get some fried fish & collards? Oh that black stuff is alllll the way over on the east side sorry but there’s a TGIFridays a few blocks up.
Sigh.
The Hampton Inn had a lovely view of the Gateway Arch a few blocks away – and that’s the ONLY nice thing I can say about that damn hotel. They hated us poets from giddyup. I do admit, we were loud, boisterous, demanding, looked weird & (some of us) smelled bad, though. They kept security visible in the lobby like it was Fresh Fest ’89.
Side note: maybe I need a late pass - but with cereal, bagles, muffins, waffles, toast, french toast & orange juice, has “continental breakfast” always been the anti-Atkins, carb-only diet?

Anyway, the best part about Nats has always been the fellowship. Shouts to Celena Glenn, Both NJ Teams, Taylor Mali & Kim Zisa. Although a lot of my favorites were absent this year, I still had my DC team to hang out with (Droopy, Twain, Chris August & 1st timer Sonya Renee). No Fu-ki wine this time, just Malibu mixed with every-dam-thing. Ain’t it a shame that the one week I really should abstain & stay in my right mind, I just go & get plastered?

I had two chances to make semi finals by scoring as high as possible in both of my bouts. The 1st night was – New Jersey, Berkley Ca, Evansville, In, Del Ray Ca, and Columbia Mo. Out of the 24 poets in the room, I got the 3rd highest score of 28.8 off of my “Epiphany” piece. Jaylee from Berkley did a gorgeous poem about living with cancer & got a perfect 30. The other sista who got a 29.3 did a piece dedicated to her aunt who had a double masectomy. Mark my words - Cancer will be the hot topic in slam poetry next year.

My 2nd night I can’t even remember the teams I had. All I know is that I received the lowest slam score I think I’ve ever gotten in my career. I got a score of 26 (twenty six) and that was the 3rd HIGHEST score in the room. Apparently these poetry judges didn’t like poetry at all. They were thoroughly unimpressed with everything.

So, coming in 3rd place in both of my bouts, I’m walking a tightrope. I had no assurance that I’d made semis, so I had to sit & wait for everyone’s scores to get tallied to see if I made the top ten. See, on that same night when my bout was happening, there were thirteen other bouts with the other 70 teams & 13 storm poets slamming (Yeah, it’s that big).

While I’m waiting I…

Ran into numerous St Louis Jawns who didn’t know diddly about slamming but oddly enough, WERE (and getting all tens, I must say)

Witnessed Benjamin Hughes doing his Benjamin Hughes thing

Found someone else who realizes how dope the book “Portable Promised Land” is

Got props from Marc Smith creator of the slam telling me that I should be in semis

Me, Jarius & Big Bru were propositioned by a drunk white chick on the street wrapping her arms around us calling us all her “boyfriends” – we escaped as she squatted behind a car relieving herself

Searched in vain for some good calamari

Rhymed – not poemed - at the hip-hop slam (albeit at 2:30am)

Drank n drank n drank n drank

Okay, so when the results finally came in, I’m ranked number 18 due to my two 3rd place finishes, BUT if they had ranked by cumulative score, I’d be #8 in the country. Can’t feel bad about that, especially since I went in knowing that I wasn’t in competitive slam shape.

But you know who was?

My DC compadre SONYA RENEE who not only ranked #5 after the 1st two bouts, but went to finals with 9 of the country’s best performance poets & left them ALL in the dust. She beat the hell outta everybody. She got a 29.7. She took home the money. She is the National Champion. I am so proud of her.

As for me, I’m retiring my “Epiphany” piece from slam contests. It’s lost it’s “poignancy” (as Nat Law would say) to me. Time for another epiphany.
Maybe when my baby comes,

The Champ is here…

Pic!


blackpicasso - 9:18 PM
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